Monday, December 31, 2012
PhatPhat Memoirs:Progression: Reflections 2012...Moving Forward
PhatPhat Memoirs:Progression: Reflections 2012...Moving Forward: Greetings! It seems like forever since my last post, however things have been all over the place for me this past month, with having the flu...
Reflections 2012...Moving Forward
Greetings! It seems like forever since my last post, however things have been all over the place for me this past month, with having the flu being the last ailment of the year for me. Gradually I am regaining my momentum, but boy did this flu virus knock me off my feet. I would say that today I am at about 75% back to my normal self. That's good enough for me considering how I have been feeling for the last few days. Anywho, enough about that...
I rarely, if ever make New Year's Resolutions and this upcoming year is no exception. It has always been my belief that the things you really intend to do usually happen if you don't particularly plan them. In saying that I mean, I have a few things that I plan to change, improve or even accomplish in the New Year, however, I will be more successful at attaining those goals if I just make a mental note of it and begin working towards it. If you have been following me or have read any of my material, you know that one of my mottos is "Sometimes you have to revisit your past to determine your future." This is how I establish my reality, set my goals, and determine the order of importance of things in my life. Revisiting 2012 is no different. In the year I experienced a mixture of highs and critical lows, however I survived and took a lesson from each event. From new beginnings, losses, and wake up calls, I have put many things in perspective. Realizing the value of sharing my experiences to inspire or encourage others was one of the priceless rewards I received this year. Not only did my experiences help others, but they helped me develop myself more as well. Throughout this journey, I have encountered many people that I otherwise would not have. Building positive relationships that will last a lifetime is instrumental in positive self development.
Another gain from 2012 was developing closer familial relationships as well as learning to distinguish which relationships are worth saving and those that are better off leaving in the past. At times we desire to salvage relationships whether personal or with family and go to extreme lengths to do so. In the end though, you have to understand that you can love individuals from a distance. Personally I struggled with this in a few relationships, but as time continued to pass, my experiences revealed that you win some, you lose some, and many are not even worth fighting for. You simply can not change other people or their opinions. Moving forward...
Gaining insight throughout this year enabled me to understand issues regarding my son as well as determine what resources are vital to him achieving his own successes. In doing so, this relationship was strengthened as well and continuous work and efforts have been employed.
Of all the lessons learned this year... Love, love of self, love of others and simply put, the REAL MEANING OF LOVE. Distinguishing between love and lust, love and like, and love and hate was a trip; but a trip worth taking. I say this because throughout this year, throughout my journey, I truly recognized the meaning of love of self. If you do not love yourself, you can't love anyone else. People use the term love so loosely these days, that if not careful, you will get caught up in a lot of foolishness. But if you have and acknowledge the love for yourself FIRST, you will be able to discern what is genuine and what is not, what you are willing to accept and what you are not. A clear understanding of yourself will enable you to accept others for who and what they are and move forward accordingly. With that being said I will close 2012 with a very different outlook on life in general, will leave some people and relationships in 2012 without looking back. I will continue moving forward in my purpose which is to continue to work on myself and grow while encouraging and motivating others. Positioning myself to continue to be a form of support to others in whatever capacity GOD sees fit for me is my primary focus.
Wishing all my readers, followers, and supporters a very blessed, prosperous, and purposeful NEW YEAR!
I rarely, if ever make New Year's Resolutions and this upcoming year is no exception. It has always been my belief that the things you really intend to do usually happen if you don't particularly plan them. In saying that I mean, I have a few things that I plan to change, improve or even accomplish in the New Year, however, I will be more successful at attaining those goals if I just make a mental note of it and begin working towards it. If you have been following me or have read any of my material, you know that one of my mottos is "Sometimes you have to revisit your past to determine your future." This is how I establish my reality, set my goals, and determine the order of importance of things in my life. Revisiting 2012 is no different. In the year I experienced a mixture of highs and critical lows, however I survived and took a lesson from each event. From new beginnings, losses, and wake up calls, I have put many things in perspective. Realizing the value of sharing my experiences to inspire or encourage others was one of the priceless rewards I received this year. Not only did my experiences help others, but they helped me develop myself more as well. Throughout this journey, I have encountered many people that I otherwise would not have. Building positive relationships that will last a lifetime is instrumental in positive self development.
Another gain from 2012 was developing closer familial relationships as well as learning to distinguish which relationships are worth saving and those that are better off leaving in the past. At times we desire to salvage relationships whether personal or with family and go to extreme lengths to do so. In the end though, you have to understand that you can love individuals from a distance. Personally I struggled with this in a few relationships, but as time continued to pass, my experiences revealed that you win some, you lose some, and many are not even worth fighting for. You simply can not change other people or their opinions. Moving forward...
Gaining insight throughout this year enabled me to understand issues regarding my son as well as determine what resources are vital to him achieving his own successes. In doing so, this relationship was strengthened as well and continuous work and efforts have been employed.
Of all the lessons learned this year... Love, love of self, love of others and simply put, the REAL MEANING OF LOVE. Distinguishing between love and lust, love and like, and love and hate was a trip; but a trip worth taking. I say this because throughout this year, throughout my journey, I truly recognized the meaning of love of self. If you do not love yourself, you can't love anyone else. People use the term love so loosely these days, that if not careful, you will get caught up in a lot of foolishness. But if you have and acknowledge the love for yourself FIRST, you will be able to discern what is genuine and what is not, what you are willing to accept and what you are not. A clear understanding of yourself will enable you to accept others for who and what they are and move forward accordingly. With that being said I will close 2012 with a very different outlook on life in general, will leave some people and relationships in 2012 without looking back. I will continue moving forward in my purpose which is to continue to work on myself and grow while encouraging and motivating others. Positioning myself to continue to be a form of support to others in whatever capacity GOD sees fit for me is my primary focus.
Wishing all my readers, followers, and supporters a very blessed, prosperous, and purposeful NEW YEAR!
Tuesday, December 11, 2012
Never be Quick to Anger...
That's a caution that is even written in the bible. But it can often be challenging to really exercise the strength to do so. For several years now I have been trying to make a practice of doing just so. Overall, with time and commitment to change within myself, I have been able to be more conscious of containing my anger. I often make every effort to make sure not to place myself in circumstances that I know have the potential to bring out the worst in me. When those times arise when I must be in a rather "testing" position, I still do whatever I can to minimize any problems. Some people may or may not agree with how I handle things, but I have to do what works best and suits me.
Being a firm believer that no one should have control over your actions, I still live in the real world. In some instances, certain things cannot be avoided. Today happened to be one of those days for me. I was prepared... to not entertain any foolishness. I positioned myself where conflict could be avoided. I handled myself in a mature manner. Being in an already unavoidable setting, I was determined to keep my focus on that particular situation and tune out all other distractions. In my own defense, I followed my plan to a "T". I had accomplished every thing that I sought out to do today. In that last 3 minutes before I was home free, the conflict began to quickly show its head. Maintaining however, I managed to stand firm and made the effort to not allow myself to get sucked in. Three minutes left...
Minute one passed. Minute two passed. But when I arrived at minute three... I lost it. It felt good in that moment, but immediately after I was disappointed in myself that I had allowed someone to have control over my emotions and actions. This is a BIG NO-NO! After I had a short time to calm down and re-evaluate the situation, I was still relieved that I had gotten my thoughts off my chest (no matter how aggressively it may have come out). Sometimes even when we try to exercise control and be the bigger person or walk away, it ends up being to our advantage to show an individual that you mean business and will not allow anyone to trample over you. Today, this was my scenario.
What I have learned as I continue in my process of being a better me, is that sometimes, people will mistake your efforts to change as a weakness. In my experience today, it appears that this was the case. Not that this is something new or an excuse to lose control, but you have to take the opportunity when needed to make sure that there is an understanding established. Yes, I have changed. Yes, I want to be slow to anger. Yes, I want to avoid conflict. However, that doesn't mean that I will just stand back and take anything, from anyone, just because I'm continuing my process of change. I am still the same person, but I have changed my approach in how I handle things. So after careful consideration I learned for the day that one should:
Never be quick to anger, but never be slow to demand your respect!
Being a firm believer that no one should have control over your actions, I still live in the real world. In some instances, certain things cannot be avoided. Today happened to be one of those days for me. I was prepared... to not entertain any foolishness. I positioned myself where conflict could be avoided. I handled myself in a mature manner. Being in an already unavoidable setting, I was determined to keep my focus on that particular situation and tune out all other distractions. In my own defense, I followed my plan to a "T". I had accomplished every thing that I sought out to do today. In that last 3 minutes before I was home free, the conflict began to quickly show its head. Maintaining however, I managed to stand firm and made the effort to not allow myself to get sucked in. Three minutes left...
Minute one passed. Minute two passed. But when I arrived at minute three... I lost it. It felt good in that moment, but immediately after I was disappointed in myself that I had allowed someone to have control over my emotions and actions. This is a BIG NO-NO! After I had a short time to calm down and re-evaluate the situation, I was still relieved that I had gotten my thoughts off my chest (no matter how aggressively it may have come out). Sometimes even when we try to exercise control and be the bigger person or walk away, it ends up being to our advantage to show an individual that you mean business and will not allow anyone to trample over you. Today, this was my scenario.
What I have learned as I continue in my process of being a better me, is that sometimes, people will mistake your efforts to change as a weakness. In my experience today, it appears that this was the case. Not that this is something new or an excuse to lose control, but you have to take the opportunity when needed to make sure that there is an understanding established. Yes, I have changed. Yes, I want to be slow to anger. Yes, I want to avoid conflict. However, that doesn't mean that I will just stand back and take anything, from anyone, just because I'm continuing my process of change. I am still the same person, but I have changed my approach in how I handle things. So after careful consideration I learned for the day that one should:
Never be quick to anger, but never be slow to demand your respect!
Monday, December 10, 2012
Supporting Detrimental Music Sends a Deadly Message
Today I want to talk about something that has been really bothering me as it relates to the influence of today's music on our impressionable teens, children in general. I love all types of music, rap included, but not as much as I like the other genres. When it comes to rap, I can take it or leave it. Many times I'm only interested in the beat and don't take time to listen to the lyrics. If a rap song has caught my attention, it's usually because the lyrics are pleasing to me or I hear something that doesn't sound quite right. In instances like this, I take more time to listen to the song in its entirety. Once I have done so, then I can make a better determination of whether it's a hit or not so much.
The younger generation of rappers, rarely catch my attention I must admit because the lyrics usually contain a little too much foolishness for me to relate to. I am really disappointed however when the lyrics are blatantly disrespectful, violent, or sending the wrong message entirely.
At this time, the young rappers who are on my radar are this Chief Keef and his crew. I must admit that the songs that I have heard thus far have been quite catchy. But when you listen to the lyrics, it's rather questionable. The videos? Even more convincing that this is pure garbage and sets a violent tone for the impressionable youth listening to such songs. Most anyone can upload a video to YouTube these days and become an overnight sensation. This seems to be the case for the aforementioned rapper. While I do not and will not ever knock anyone's hustle, what I can say is that when you promote negativity, you get negativity. He has made some impressive accomplishments, such as being the youngest rapper to get his own label on Interscope, getting his own line of Beats by Dre headphones, and just an overall success at such a young age. I have even read that there will be a biopic of his life. All great accomplishments, but at what cost? Isn't the saying, if you know better you do better?
The lyrics in his music just amaze me. Constant talk of violence, constant displays of weapons. This kid is only 17! He is making a great impression on our youth. But it would be so much more inspiring if he could try to focus now on the positive. For instance, in an interview he makes mention about dropping out of school at 15, being a father at 16. These are issues that affect many teens today. In his down time, on house arrest for a weapons charge, he focused more on his rap and it paid off. So now let's use that experience to promote positivity. Show the youth that even though you come from an unhealthy environment, you can make changes and achieve your dreams. Why promote violence, drugs, and photos of a girl giving you oral sex for the whole world to see? There is much more positivity that can be drawn from the experiences of Chief Keef. I guess it bothers me so much because I have a son that is 16 and I have often seen how he and his peers are influenced by music and lyrics.
In my opinion if you have been given the opportunity to reach so many individuals on so many levels, why not use it to promote the good? Change the negative, promote the positive and use your experiences as a platform to inspire others! The negativity is what got your foot in the door, now change the scene and show them the positives? What good is your accomplishment if you can't share it with others in a positive and uplifting manner? An impressionable youth can use the lyrics in a negative way by taking it out of context, rather than just for entertainment. Chief Keef is not the only rapper/entertainer that does this, just the one on my radar at this time. We should support music that has purpose! Supporting such rappers as Chief Keef, sends a deadly message! We gotta wake up!!!
~PhatPhat~
The younger generation of rappers, rarely catch my attention I must admit because the lyrics usually contain a little too much foolishness for me to relate to. I am really disappointed however when the lyrics are blatantly disrespectful, violent, or sending the wrong message entirely.
At this time, the young rappers who are on my radar are this Chief Keef and his crew. I must admit that the songs that I have heard thus far have been quite catchy. But when you listen to the lyrics, it's rather questionable. The videos? Even more convincing that this is pure garbage and sets a violent tone for the impressionable youth listening to such songs. Most anyone can upload a video to YouTube these days and become an overnight sensation. This seems to be the case for the aforementioned rapper. While I do not and will not ever knock anyone's hustle, what I can say is that when you promote negativity, you get negativity. He has made some impressive accomplishments, such as being the youngest rapper to get his own label on Interscope, getting his own line of Beats by Dre headphones, and just an overall success at such a young age. I have even read that there will be a biopic of his life. All great accomplishments, but at what cost? Isn't the saying, if you know better you do better?
The lyrics in his music just amaze me. Constant talk of violence, constant displays of weapons. This kid is only 17! He is making a great impression on our youth. But it would be so much more inspiring if he could try to focus now on the positive. For instance, in an interview he makes mention about dropping out of school at 15, being a father at 16. These are issues that affect many teens today. In his down time, on house arrest for a weapons charge, he focused more on his rap and it paid off. So now let's use that experience to promote positivity. Show the youth that even though you come from an unhealthy environment, you can make changes and achieve your dreams. Why promote violence, drugs, and photos of a girl giving you oral sex for the whole world to see? There is much more positivity that can be drawn from the experiences of Chief Keef. I guess it bothers me so much because I have a son that is 16 and I have often seen how he and his peers are influenced by music and lyrics.
In my opinion if you have been given the opportunity to reach so many individuals on so many levels, why not use it to promote the good? Change the negative, promote the positive and use your experiences as a platform to inspire others! The negativity is what got your foot in the door, now change the scene and show them the positives? What good is your accomplishment if you can't share it with others in a positive and uplifting manner? An impressionable youth can use the lyrics in a negative way by taking it out of context, rather than just for entertainment. Chief Keef is not the only rapper/entertainer that does this, just the one on my radar at this time. We should support music that has purpose! Supporting such rappers as Chief Keef, sends a deadly message! We gotta wake up!!!
~PhatPhat~
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